What Is So Bad About Being Forever Alone?
HI, my name is Barbara and I’m a serial singleton. Now before you get all judgemental and assume that I am a man-hating feminist (nothing wrong with feminists but no need for any hate), I have been in relationships before. But for the last while, I have been single. Being single has given me time to think about and experience how society treats single people; women in particular.
How many of you single ladies have turned down offers of being set up by your friends, have rolled your eyes at your mothers pleas for grandchildren and have held your tongue at sentences that start with “He’s out there somewhere…“, “If you only gave him a chance…” and “If you weren’t so picky…“?
There is something about a single woman that makes other people uncomfortable. I don’t know if they think that you will try and steal their other half or if they are afraid you are going to turn into some crazy cat lady who ends up being found dead in her apartment with half a face (after the aforementioned cats got hungry) but they just can’t seem to grasp that you might be okay with being single and, dare I say it, happy!
Why does society think it so bad to end up alone? As women we are still, in this day and age, brought up to believe we have to settle down, get married and have children to be normal. Men aren’t brought up like this. They are told to go and sow their wild oats and have fun for as long as possible. Single men of a certain age are bachelors, which has little negative connotations. They are often seen as lovable old rogues who just prefer taking care of themselves. However, single women of a certain age are spinsters or old maids which conjure up images of witchlike ugly women who cannot find themselves a man who would ever want them.
Before this starts turning into a head-swivelling ‘I don’t need no man’ type of article I just want to say I am not opposed to relationships. I get that it is nice to wake up next to someone and tell them about your dream, to have someone to come home to in the evenings and most importantly to have someone who understands and listens to you. For those of you have that, you are lucky but for those of us that don’t, that doesn’t make us unlucky. We are strong, independent women who are unwilling to settle for just anyone so that we can be one of those lucky couples, at least from the outside.
Some may be waiting for that special someone to come along, some may be actively looking for them and others may be happy just the way they are. There is nothing wrong with being single and happy in your own company. It just means that if you decide to settle down you will know it’s for the right reasons and with the right person. So don’t be pressured by society, by your friends or even by your mother. Stand tall and proud fellow singles because forever alone doesn’t mean a damn thing.
Photos c/o postgradproblems.com, thoughtcatalog.com